Jantsen’s Gift – Week 5 – Chapter 11-Epilogue

Hello all,

Well, I think I can speak for most of us when I say that this experience of reading Jantsen’s Gift has been a life-changing one.  I want to thank all of you who have gone on this journey with us.  It has truly been amazing.  And I have a feeling that it is only beginning.

This story has served as a jumpstart for me and my wife as we have read through it together.  We are people who have never had to deal with much suffering in our lives.  The blessings have always abounded.  But, the Copes’ story is causing us to question so many of the things that we have taken for granted and I believe that God has used it to call us to a greater identity not only as individuals but as a couple and a family.  I wish I could tell you exactly what that was going to look like, but I can’t.  I just know that something powerful is happening in our lives and this story has been a major reason (not the only one) why.      

The quote that I want to share with you comes from the Epilogue.  “It wasn’t just my son that I lost; it was my ego, and my fears, and the labels I had allowed myself to be defined by: hairdresser, stay-at-home mom, wife.  Yes, I am and was all of those things, but I made the mistake of believing that that was all I was.  Only when I was forced to abandon those labels, and the limitations I put on myself, was I able to discover a sense of peace and purpose I never thought possible.”

We were created for so much more than some of the labels and purposes we attach to our lives.  I thank Pam for reminding us of what it can mean to be truly human, to be part of God’s world-changing mission.  No, that doesn’t mean that we won’t still have our issues.  But, the identity that God can give us is simply more rewarding in the end. 

This weekend several of us had the chance to hear Pam speak at the ChristianWorks auction and I was so thrilled to have that chance to meet Pam and Randy in person and thank them for their work.  I was so excited to see ChristianWorks and Touch-A-Life partnering to do more work in places like Ghana with children who need someone to “stand in the gap” for them.  I know this will lead to amazing things.  As I listened to Pam I was struck by the fact that I am so thankful for her life and for Jantsen’s life and for the new life that God has brought out of a terrible tragedy.  Many of you have expressed the same thing.    

So, for the final blog entry for this book I would like for us to do something a little bit different with our comments.  I would like for us to use this space to thank Pam and Randy for their courage, their passion, their devotion to the mission of God, and their willingness to share their story with the world and with us.  Take a moment in the comments to thank them for whatever you are most grateful for in your experience of reading this book.  This will also give us a chance to talk about the portions of this book that have affected us the most.  

As I have spoken to many of you about this book over these past weeks, there have been two major themes that I have noticed: 1. Most of us have had the bizarre experience of feeling that we know Pam really well even though we haven’t ever met her and 2. God is working through this story to bring incredible change and transformation to many of our hearts.  Well, here’s your chance to thank Pam for her work, her story, and her willingness to be used by God.    

Jason

Check Back Tomorrow

Hello all,

I wanted to let you know that our final installment of the Jantsen’s Gift book blog will be posted tomorrow morning. In that post I will be commenting on Chapter 11 and the Epilogue as well as reflecting some on the opportunity I had this past weekend to hear Pam Cope speak at the ChristianWorks Auction in Dallas.

Jason

Jantsen’s Gift – Week 4 – Chapters 9-10

Good Monday Afternoon Everyone –

I hope that you are doing well.  This week, we’re going to be thinking about and talking about chapters 9-10 of Jantsen’s Gift.   It’s been true along in this book, but these chapters were filled with moments where I just had to stop reading to catch my breath.  I don’t usually tear up much when I’m reading, but there were many places in these pages where I just couldn’t stop. 

I have often found it to be true, that the most inspiring stories happen in the midst of the darkest stories.  Pam’s decision to do something about Mark and the other six kids who make up “The Magnificent Seven” is one of the most amazing decisions I’ve had the ability to explore in such intimate detail.  Too many times in my life, I let the enormity of any sad social issue paralyze me into doing nothing, while I carry around all kinds of guilt about the pain that others are going through.  Pam fights past that paralyzing fear, and fights her hardest to do what she can.  I love that about her.

I’d like to ask everyone who is willing, to share which section of these two chapters, really convicted you that you could do more in this world to help others in need?

For me, that moment came on pages 192-3, when Pam and Randy were sharing dinner in their backyard with a couple from Liberia, and at one point, Pam shares that she wants to raise more money to help more and more people in Africa.  The man from Liberia, named Korma, gave Pam a funny look and said, “Pam, I have to ask you this, why do you talk about needing to raise money?”  He waved his hand across the pool, the huge yard, and pointed up towards the 5500 square foot house.  “You have been blessed with so much.  And it looks to me like everything you need is already right here.”  At first, Pam is angry at his words, but the more she thinks about it, the more she knows he’s right.  She shares, “Something about Korma’s words had shaken me, making me admit to myself that even though Randy and I had embarked on this new journey, we were still trying to drag along so much stuff.”  In a matter of days, Pam and Randy had decided to downsize their house, and their lifestyle.

This is definitely the section of these chapters that has been following me around the most.  It’s the Cope’s decision to downsize that allows Pam to have enough money to go and rescue enslaved children in Africa.  There is a quote that had always haunted me… “We rob our brothers through all that we own.”  We have so much stuff, carry so much debt, that we don’t have the space we need in our budgets to help people who can’t really get help any other way.  I want to change my own spending habits.  I want to stop limiting my ability to help because I can’t control my hunger to have more and more.  I want to “live simply so that others can simply live.”  What about you?

Okay…so what section convinced you that you need to change something in your life?

- Jarrod

Jantsen’s Gift – Week 3 – Chapters 6-8

Hello all,

Thank you to everyone who commented on last week’s entry.  Obviously, this book is having major impact on many of us.  I know that there have been times when I have had to lay the book down for a while and simply think about what God may be saying to me as I read this incredible story.  I hope you are having the same experience.

In the chapters that we read for this week, we really delve into the early successes and failures of this amazing ministry that Pan has begun.  As I read about some of the adventures that she had in trying to help kids who were in desperate need, I was struck by two things.  The first is the idea that this kind of redemptive activity could be born out of such a terrible tragedy.  The second is that this mission that Pam finds herself immersed in seems to be incredibly contagious. 

Chapter Eight opens with a letter to Jantsen (try making it through those with dry eyes) that describes the heart-breaking beauty of the redemptive work that God brought to the tragedy of Jantsen’s death.  “Dear Jantsen, I have paid a high price to be living the life I am experiencing now.  I see things so clearly now and love you even more for leading me to my purpose.  This may not be the life I’d have chosen, but it is the one I now choose to embrace.  Love, Mom”

This letter reminded me of a promise that Pam received from her brother-in-law earlier in the book:  “You need to know something.  You are going to be sadder and your life is going to be harder than you ever thought.  But it’s going to be richer, too, and much deeper.  You will feel things you have never felt before, and have a perspective you would never have otherwise had.  It’s going to be very bad, but it’s also going to be unbelievably great.”

The truth here is that God can truly bring world-changing redemption out of soul-changing loss.  The question is:  Do we really believe that?  I’m afraid in my life I spend too much time trying to avoid pain and loss and discomfort when many of the people that I know who are most tied into God’s mission in this world are people who have tasted immense amounts of suffering.  I’m not saying that we should seek out suffering, I’m simply saying that our tendencies to be driven by anxiety and worry seem silly in the face of all that God can do through the lives of faithful people.

I also mentioned that this mission of Pam’s seems to be contagious.  I know there are times when I want to jump in feet first.  I am struck by the amount of people in her life who found themselves wanting to adopt a child or travel with her.  Isn’t it amazing how God’s mission spreads when passionate faithful people take it seriously.  One of the questions I would like to ask you is :  Where are some other places in this world that you have seen the mission of God spread in this way?  How has witnessing those things affected you?

 

I also want to open up the question that Jarrod asked last week:  What passages or ideas from these chapters have stuck with you?  How have they impacted or changed you?

Jason

Jantsen’s Gift | Week 2 | Chapters 3-5

Good Monday Afternoon All –

I apologize that I am posting so late in the day.  Our AC went out at the house yesterday, and I’m stuck dealing with estimates and decisions that I wish I didn’t have to think about.  I’m sure you all know what I’m talking about.  Unfortunately

I really want to hear from those of you who are reading this week.  John, thanks so much for the thoughts you shared with us last week.  I know from talking to many of you who are taking this journey through Jantsen’s Gift with us, that it is a book that is touching you, heart and soul.  I’d like for us to take this week to share whatever it is so far in the book that has really impacted us.  I know, I know that there are too many great quotes and good thoughts to just pick one, but that’s what I’m asking you to try and do. 

So what is it?  What word, or phrase, image, or thought has really touched you?  What about this book won’t leave you alone?

I’ll share mine to get the ball rolling.  At one point in chapter 3, Pam shares an observation while watching women in the Vietnam countryside working out in the fields.  She decides that many of them have probably experienced the loss of a child.  But unlike her, they have to deal with that devastating loss much differently.  She says, “…Here, losing a child didn’t mean that a mother could stop working.  She couldn’t just curl up somewhere, writing in her journal and reading grief books.  A day of work meant a day without eating.  What a difference from my experience.” (Pg. 71)

My Dad once told me, “Son, poor people don’t sit around wondering what their purpose in life is.  They don’t have that luxury.  Only the rich have the free time you need to worry and fret about things that in the end, may not really matter all that much.”  He said this to me at the height of the “Purpose-Driven” publishing craze.  He was making an important point that has stayed with me. 

When I have the time to wallow in self-pity, angst, worry about not mattering enough, or not knowing my precise purpose in life, I am experiencing a kind of life that only rich (spoiled) people can ever experience.  And it may not be a healthy thing after all.  Maybe I need to learn a lesson from the people who can’t afford to waste time on those kinds of self-focused thoughts.  Maybe I need to focus on feeding my family and making sure we have a place to live and clothes to wear, maybe I need to pay attention to the simple things in my life that make my life possible.  Maybe I need to be thankful when all of my basic needs are met, and I need to live out that gratitude and joy instead of obsessing over what else I kind find in my life that isn’t just quite right.  Maybe.

I’m not saying that grief is something you can avoid or skip over, but I am suggesting that grief, like any emotion, can become something we wallow in, simply because our station in life allows us that time and space.  And I wonder if that is always the best way to handle loss.

Okay, I shared my thoughts with you…please take some time this week to share yours.

-Jarrod

Jantsen’s Gift | Week 1 | Chapters 1-2

Hello all,

Well, it is good to be back reading together.  I know that some of you have already started our book, Jantsen’s Gift, and have made it pretty far into the story.  For this first week our discussion will come out of the first two chapters and, as you know, there is plenty there to talk about.  In fact, there is too much for one post to cover but I will try to touch on some of the major things that stuck out to me and allow the discussion to go where it will.

It doesn’t take very long to know that the story we are being invited to listen to is one of deep tragedy and life-altering pain.  However, I am grateful that the book doesn’t simply jump right into the horrific events surrounding the death of Jantsen.  There is an acknowledgement from the very beginning that this story will have moments of rescue and redemption.  Though the pain of profound loss will never fully go away, God’s hand has the ability to bring good stories out of bad ones.  Without that assurance this story, in fact, all of life would be simply unbearable.

 In the first chapter Pam Cope describes a Ghanaian tradition that occurs when two people meet each other for the first time.  They share two things about themselves: “This is where I’ve been, and this is my mission moving forward.”  I have not been able to shake that line from my memory.  What would happen if we began to introduce ourselves that way?  What would you say?  How would that change the ways that we see each other? 

This seems to be the author’s reason for telling this story, not to dwell on a painful past but to allow us to know how that past has created a mission for her.  That idea alone is inspiring to me.

One of the major themes of this book is the uneasiness that many of us feel or have felt about our lives.  Pam (I know it’s weird to talk about her with just her first name, but for some reason, it feels appropriate) does a remarkable job of describing that nagging feeling that our lives don’t have a purpose or that the purposes we have chosen for ourselves are far too small.  Then, at one point she says something that I think we need to hear.  She says, “Well, for all of the stress this whole thing caused me at the time, I couldn’t see then what I believe to be true now:  That questioning wasn’t angering God.  That questioning was God.  That voice, that instinct, that constant poking in my heart, telling me I wanted something more, it wasn’t me being selfish and ungrateful: It was me finally paying attention.”

 I will probably comment on this idea later in the week, but I want to hear what you think.  How true do you think this statement is?  How do we go from viewing this discontent as a self-centered pity party to seeing it as a call from God?  What has your experience with this been?

It would be silly of me to try to summarize Pam’s account of the tragic loss of her son and the beginning of the grief that gripped her life after that.  Her telling of it is honest, captivating, and extremely difficult to read.  I am thankful for her willingness to share that with the world.  I was especially struck by her description of how meaningless so many things became after Jantsen’s death.  It is no exaggeration when she claims that she lost everything because everything did change in permanent ways.

 

Which parts of her story stuck with you?  What do you think the value is in her sharing this story with complete strangers through this book?  What does her honesty do for you and your life?

 

Well, that is plenty to comment on for now.  Feel free to comment on any of this or anything that stood out to you from these chapters.

Jason

Summer Break Coming to an End

Hello all,

We are coming close to the end of our summer break.  We wanted to give you one more “heads up” before we begin.  We will be starting up on September 14 and we are looking forward to reading Jantsen’s Gift by Pam Cope.  Click HERE for more information about this book.  Also, you will find a link to the right to the Jantsen’s Gift Amazon page if you would like to buy it there. 

I know that this inspiring and challenging true story will have a profound impact on the way you look at the world.  I know that’s a bold claim, but it is truly a remarkable story.

Here is the schedule for our reading of this book:

September 14: Introduction – Chapter 2

September 21: Chapters 3 – 5

September 28: Chapters 6 – 8

October 5: Chapters 9 – 10

October 12: Chapter 11 – Epilogue

 We look forward to reading this book together.  We invite you to join us.

 Jason

Summer Break

Good Tuesday Everyone –

Well, Jason and I have thought about it, and we’ve made the decision to take a summer break from this particular book blog.  Both of us have several books we’d like to work through during this summer, so that we can have a sense for some new exciting books to explore together in the Fall. 

Having said that, we do know what our next book is going to be.  Our first discussion week will start on Monday September 14, 2009.  The book is entitled “Jantsen’s Gift.”  You can find out more about it by clicking HERE.

The author of this book recently moved into our community, and it is our hope that we will be able to interact with her in one way or another as we journey together through her true story of grief, rescue, and grace.

We’d love for you to fill us in on what you’re hoping to read this summer while we take this brief break.

Happy Reading!

Jarrod

2 Week Break…

Good Monday Afternoon…

We wanted to thank everyone for taking our most recent journey together.  The Road to Daybreak is a challenging read from a spiritual standpoint.  Thanks for sticking with us.  Jason and I have really enjoyed and have been profoundly blessed by your thoughts and insights along the way.

We are going to take a 2 week break on the blog, as we go through the process of choosing the next book we will read and discuss together.  Come and stop by on May 25 to see the new book title.  We won’t begin a new discussion on that book until sometime early in June.

Thanks again.  Happy Reading!

- Jarrod

Road to Daybreak | Week 5 | Chapters 21 – Epilogue

Good Tuesday Morning Everyone…

This is Jarrod.  I am leaving in just a few hours for the Pepperdine Lectures.  I just sat down to post this blog entry and realized that I forgot my book at the church office, which means I can’t really type in any of the quotes I would like to share this week.  I know that sounds like a lousy excuse, but it is nevertheless, the truth. 

So, the only real option left to me is to ask you all for a huge favor.  Can you leave a comment to this post that offers the rest of us your favorite quote from this final section of The Road to Daybreak?  As Jason said last week, each and every section of this book has been so inspiring and convicting.  Nouwen’s simple approach to sharing the deepest parts of who he is, acts as a profound blessing and guide to us on our own spiritual journeys. 

Where has he encouraged or challenged you the most in this book?

Jason and I look forward to reading your thoughts and impressions.